Was zum Lachen

Boy calls 911.
Boy: Hello? I need your help!
911: Alright, What is it?
Boy: Two girls are fighting over me!
911: So what's your emergency?
Boy: The ugly one is winning.
 
A woman walks into a drugstore and asks the pharmacist if he sells size extra large condoms.
He replies, "Yes we do. Would you like to buy some?" he responds,
"No sir, but do you mind if I wait around here until someone does?"
 
A guy walks into an elevator and stands next to a beautiful woman.
After a few minutes he turns to her and says, “Can I smell your pussy?”
The woman looks at him in disgust and says, “Certainly not!”
“Hmmm,” he replies. “It must be your feet, then.”
 
A woman who was beaten black and blue, went to the doctor. Doctor: "What happened?" Woman: "Doctor, I don’t know what to do. Every time my husband comes home drunk, he beats me to a pulp." Doctor: "I have a real good medicine for that. Whenever your husband comes home inebriated, just take a glass of chamomile tea and start gargling with it. Just gargle and gargle." Two weeks later she returns to the doctor,and looks reborn and fresh again. Woman: "Doc, That was a brilliant idea! Every time my husband came home drunk, I gargled with chamomile tea and gargled and nothing happened." Doctor: "You see how keeping your mouth shut helps!"
 
2 Freunde treffen sich zum gemeinsamen 50er: feiern wir unseren Geburtstag im Gasthaus Dieminger, weil da is so eine geile Kellnerin

10 Jahre später zum 60er: feiern wir unseren Geburtstag im Gasthaus Dieminger, weil da gibt‘s so a feines Schnitzerl

10 Jahre soäter zum 70er: feiern wir unseren Geburtstag im Gasthaus Dieminger, weil da gibts a guats Achterl

10 Jahre später zum 80er: feiern wir unseren Geburtstag im Gasthaus Dieminger, weil da waren wir noch nie :D
 
Mitglied #331124 schrieb:
A guy walks into an elevator and stands next to a beautiful woman.
After a few minutes he turns to her and says, “Can I smell your pussy?”
The woman looks at him in disgust and says, “Certainly not!”
“Hmmm,” he replies. “It must be your feet, then.”
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umgekehrt wär er sogar noch witziger!
 

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